iBaby

I had a three day weekend because I called in sick on Friday. You'd think this would make coming to work on Monday less painful, but you would be wrong. My life would be so much more manageable if I could figure out how to have a three day work week.

Not only was my weekend long, it was also very eventful.

Thursday night I performed my act at Hank's Saloon which I would argue is the awesomest bar in Brooklyn. I had tons of fun, but somehow didn't end up getting home until 2am. While this might be normal for some 25 year olds in New York, I cannot remember the last time I was out that late. On a weeknight no less! I apparently prefer to spend my evenings in a bathrobe with my cat drinking tea and watching the Lawrence Welk show.

One of the benefits of being sick on Friday was that I could spend the day working on my story. Of course instead of doing this, I spent most of the day reading things online and watching TV. My biggest accomplishments were going to the Whole Foods on the Bowery and catching up on The Realhousewives of New York. I did feel guilty enough about this to work on my story from 12-7 on Saturday, so maybe being lazy is good for me.

Sunday was filled with small children. Leigh performed an interactive show for a bunch of little kids at BAX that was ridiculously cute. Imagine a bunch of 3 year olds wearing sparkly scarves and singing Tomorrow while sitting in a misshapen circle. ADORABLE. Then Doug and I had drinks with our married friends and their 20 month old baby. True Story: The baby knows how to use an iPhone. This completely blew my mind and also made me feel very old/want a baby. I just have to keep reminding myself that babies turn into 10 year olds who eventually turn into teenagers, and I am so not interested in dealing with a teenager.

Why Yes I Would Like Some Cheese With My Whine

I posted a picture of a crab because I am feeling crabby. I thought about posting a picture of a machete but it freaked me out too much.

I'm doing that thing I always do which is spend 10 minutes being depressed because I don't feel like I have enough going on, then immediately overbook myself for a month and become depressed because I have way too much going on. Last week was good. I went to the gym for the first time in over a year and actually had some time to breathe. Doug went out of town for the weekend and I didn't even freak out like I normally do and wake up thirty times in the night convinced that a crazy person is about to break in and hack me up with a machete. Things were good.

Now though, it's only Wednesday and I'm already breaking down and contemplating calling in sick on Friday because I don't know how I'll make it through the week. I'm performing at Hank's Saloon in Brooklyn tomorrow which is awesome, but I also have a story due for my writing group on Monday which is not. Or maybe it is because without these deadlines I'm pretty sure I would never get any writing done. Sigh. I really shouldn't complain and just be grateful that I made it through the weekend in one piece instead of fifty.

If You Post It . . .

I started writing this post last week, but work was crazy and I got distracted so I'm posting it now even though it's out of date. If you don't like it well, tough.

Last weekend Doug and I went to Philadelphia to visit my family for Easter. As predicted, it was much easier to deal with them with him there. Highlights included:

Stumbling into a petting zoo being set up in the street near my aunt and uncle's condo where we were staying. Apparently I turn into a five year old when confronted with baby animals. Every other adult was there with a small child and I had to strategically make my way over to the animal pens without knocking over four toddlers in the process.

Finding a pair of boots that look EXACTLY like the ones pictured in my post last week. They are horribly uncomfortable and bend my toes in weird directions, but I'll get used to that right? They were only $18! Maybe if I post a picture of a million dollar check and a book contract I'll find those too . . .

Watching the Butler vs. Michigan game at my grandmother's retirement home. My grandmother actually went to Butler a gajillion years ago when hardly any women attended college. She majored in home ec., but whatever. It's still pretty cool. She always watches Butler in the NCAA championships, and even though I almost never watch sports, it was a great game and I actually got into it. This was apparently a problem because no one else in the home watches basketball and any time one of my family members cheered or got excited, my grandmother would yell at us for making too much noise

Happy Easter!

In two hours I'm leaving my office to catch a bus to Philadelphia with Doug so that we can visit my family for Easter. My family is weird. It's weird for many reasons, far too many to list here, but one of the reasons it's weird is that even though we are not very religious we make a big thing about celebrating Easter every year. I never understood this was strange until I graduated from college and discovered I'm the only one who still goes home for it.

As much as my family drives me crazy I really like going home for Easter. Why? Because Easter is awesome. You get candy (or at least I do because my family still thinks I'm 12)! It's nice out! Peeps! Have you ever put a Peep in the microwave? It is the definition of joy. The holiday has also become infinitely easier to stomach since Doug has started coming with me. Most people get stressed out by the idea of bringing their boyfriend home to hang out with their family, but having Doug there actually takes pressure off of me. He and my dad can hang out and talk about sports and cars or whatever while I escape to the kitchen and happily nuke marshmallow bunnies.